Don't Be That Guy
Here's a friendly tip. If a guy wants to pique a girl's interest on xHamster, then he needs to come up with a good introductory message. Below are just a few of the introductory messages that I've received from guys that just don't work for me and I simply can't respond to them. So I suggest, don't be That Guy who sends these types of messages. But if you're even reading this blog, then you are probably not That Guy because he rarely reads what's on a page anyway. At least by posting this blog I can ignore That Guy in good conscience because I told him so here. I hope I don't come off as bitchy. I'm just sayin'. So here are some of those intro lines:
“Hey”
“Hi “
“Hello”
“Hey babe”
“Hi sexy”
“Hey, Slut”
“Let's be friends. Send me an add.” -----Please give me a simple reason why you want to be friends. Something like “I like your page” or “I'm a friend collector” will work.
“Do you want to hear about my STD?”
“Look at my page. I think we have a lot in common”-------I look at his page and he's been on xHamster for 100 days and all he has on his page are a bunch of friends and nothing about himself.
“Check out my page.”-----------I try to check out his page and it's closed.
“Look at my cock pics and comment”--------Maybe I will if you comment on something of mine first.
[canned message]-------What I mean by “canned message” is a message that – at first glance – seems very detailed and interesting. But upon closer reading I see nothing in it personal to me and I conclude that he's been spamming the exact same message to hundreds of girls hoping for a nibble.
“how r u P D :”------------This isn't Twitter. Please don't text me. Send me something written in English.
“What's your name, babe?”--------My name is already on my page so this question tells me all I need to know.
“What kind of videos do you like?”--------I've got quite a few Favorites so take a look.
“Tell me your fantasies?”---------Why should I spend time writing out my fantasies to That Guy when he only takes a few seconds of his time to type four words?
“What are you wearing right now?”
“fap fap?”
“What's your bra size?”
“cam2cam?”
“add me to Yahoo IM”
“I'm on cam right now. Cum watch me jerk off.”
“Do you skype?”
“Hit me up”
“Got any pics?”
“How come no pics, babe?”
“I'll give you a tribute if you send me a pic”
“You like BBC?”
“Think you can handle my 10 incher?”
“What's a pretty thing like you doing on a site like this?”
“I want to tie you up and fuck your ass.”
“What's your cell number?”---------Be careful with this question. On a few occasions I've given That Guy the phone number of his local police department.
“Do you have sex with your dad or your girls?”
[That Guy just sends me a link to a picture of his cock]-------I don't click on any links in an intro message if they don't include a message with it.
“Do you need a slave?”
“I'm your Master.”
“Your Daddy's here.”
“What are you doing right now?”
“How are you today?”
“What time is it over there?”
[That Guy asks me about something that's spelled out in plain English in my About Me write-up]
“Can you help me jerk off?”
“Are you real?”
“I think you're fake”
“Feeling horny?”
“I'm so horny.”
“My cock is so hard right now.”
“Wanna chat?”
“Hey, bitch, waz up?”
“What's the most kinky thing you've done?”------See my comment above to the question about what my biggest fantasy is.
“I've got something nice and hard for you”
“Are you into vomit?”
“Let's hook up. I'm in Nebraska too.”
“My name's Jim”
“Can I ask you a question?”
I think a good rule of thumb for what works would be to ask yourself if that line would work in the “real world” - even in some place like a bar.
I don't mean to be negative here so I'll offer a constructive suggestion. If a guy really finds a girl interesting, then he should spend some time reading through what she has on her page and then write up a thoughtful and thought provoking message about something she's interested in. Also, comments go a long way too. Many girls here gets hundreds of private messages a day and what stands out is an interesting comment under one of her pics, vids, stories or blogs.
I've heard it said that it is hard to get a girl's attention on xHamster because the guys outnumber the girls 100 to 1. But take heart. 99% of the guys on this site are like That Guy who writes less than inspiring intro messages.
“Hey”
“Hi “
“Hello”
“Hey babe”
“Hi sexy”
“Hey, Slut”
“Let's be friends. Send me an add.” -----Please give me a simple reason why you want to be friends. Something like “I like your page” or “I'm a friend collector” will work.
“Do you want to hear about my STD?”
“Look at my page. I think we have a lot in common”-------I look at his page and he's been on xHamster for 100 days and all he has on his page are a bunch of friends and nothing about himself.
“Check out my page.”-----------I try to check out his page and it's closed.
“Look at my cock pics and comment”--------Maybe I will if you comment on something of mine first.
[canned message]-------What I mean by “canned message” is a message that – at first glance – seems very detailed and interesting. But upon closer reading I see nothing in it personal to me and I conclude that he's been spamming the exact same message to hundreds of girls hoping for a nibble.
“how r u P D :”------------This isn't Twitter. Please don't text me. Send me something written in English.
“What's your name, babe?”--------My name is already on my page so this question tells me all I need to know.
“What kind of videos do you like?”--------I've got quite a few Favorites so take a look.
“Tell me your fantasies?”---------Why should I spend time writing out my fantasies to That Guy when he only takes a few seconds of his time to type four words?
“What are you wearing right now?”
“fap fap?”
“What's your bra size?”
“cam2cam?”
“add me to Yahoo IM”
“I'm on cam right now. Cum watch me jerk off.”
“Do you skype?”
“Hit me up”
“Got any pics?”
“How come no pics, babe?”
“I'll give you a tribute if you send me a pic”
“You like BBC?”
“Think you can handle my 10 incher?”
“What's a pretty thing like you doing on a site like this?”
“I want to tie you up and fuck your ass.”
“What's your cell number?”---------Be careful with this question. On a few occasions I've given That Guy the phone number of his local police department.
“Do you have sex with your dad or your girls?”
[That Guy just sends me a link to a picture of his cock]-------I don't click on any links in an intro message if they don't include a message with it.
“Do you need a slave?”
“I'm your Master.”
“Your Daddy's here.”
“What are you doing right now?”
“How are you today?”
“What time is it over there?”
[That Guy asks me about something that's spelled out in plain English in my About Me write-up]
“Can you help me jerk off?”
“Are you real?”
“I think you're fake”
“Feeling horny?”
“I'm so horny.”
“My cock is so hard right now.”
“Wanna chat?”
“Hey, bitch, waz up?”
“What's the most kinky thing you've done?”------See my comment above to the question about what my biggest fantasy is.
“I've got something nice and hard for you”
“Are you into vomit?”
“Let's hook up. I'm in Nebraska too.”
“My name's Jim”
“Can I ask you a question?”
I think a good rule of thumb for what works would be to ask yourself if that line would work in the “real world” - even in some place like a bar.
I don't mean to be negative here so I'll offer a constructive suggestion. If a guy really finds a girl interesting, then he should spend some time reading through what she has on her page and then write up a thoughtful and thought provoking message about something she's interested in. Also, comments go a long way too. Many girls here gets hundreds of private messages a day and what stands out is an interesting comment under one of her pics, vids, stories or blogs.
I've heard it said that it is hard to get a girl's attention on xHamster because the guys outnumber the girls 100 to 1. But take heart. 99% of the guys on this site are like That Guy who writes less than inspiring intro messages.
11 years ago
I've had SO MANY Men throwing random cringy messages at Me...
My favorite is a typical from Indian Men (they all seem to have only ONE thing in mind, all the time)
"Do yOU LikE hAvInG sEx??
"sEnD pIc oF YoUr BoBs AnD VeGaNa"
I know the ladies get a lot of crap here - but I doubt the off-line world is all that much better - so I would encourage members like you to set your messages to "Friends Only", and then give invitations a chance. Click on the person inviting you - you'll probably be able to tell pretty quickly if it's someone you might share an interest with. If so, have a go - if not, block. The bastards of this world don't make it easy for any of us considerate people - we just have to find out way of keeping them in the background and not wasting our energy. Regradless, hope you have found you M.O. for how to operate here. The site can be really great when you find the right combination site attributes for you.
1. at least glanced over her profile
2. after you glanced found some interest in her
3. use that as a way of communicating to her
3. if you are not interested don't message her move on. Even if you just want to get rid of blue balls. Its not worth your time and energy.
Honestly most of the people on here are boring and have jack shit for a profile. Don't try to talk to someone who doesn't have at least a few sentences in their profile. Also if your profile doesn't have much to go on don't expect much from others either.
Unfortunatelly, i talk with 3 or 4 people here out of 300 friends i have...
"Hi"
"Hello"
"How are you"
"Come sit on my face" (had to drop that one in hehe)
But here's a question.. would you reply back to the 1% of guys who do make an effort? Or would they have to catch your eye as well. Pm me or comment me what u would do x
If you are an attractive woman out there looking for an attractive, in shape, 40 something guy with all his hair who can communicate above the third grade level send me a message. I'd love to NOT "Be That Guy" in your case...