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Introduction:

If you've heard this, too bad for you.

Once, a curious 5-year-old heard her parents arguing. She eavesdropped as they called each other names like bitch and bastard. She interrupted and asked them what a bitch is and what a bastard is.

Her mother told her that a bitch is a woman and a bastard is a man. That night after their parents made up she overheard them panting in their bedroom “put your dick in my wet pussy” her mother said. She asked them for the meaning of the terms dick and pussy the following morning during breakfast and they lied once again.
"Oh sweetheart, a dick is a coat and pussy is another name for a handbag." Her father convinced.
"Dad, a coat can't fit into a handbag."
"Well honey...your mother has a really big handbag." He replied and looked at his wife who was visibly angry and was hurt by what he said.

That same day she heard her mother shout “shit” after cutting herself in the kitchen. The little girl slowly approaches her mother and asks what “shit” is. Her mother, running out of lies, told her that to shit is to cook.

Her father was in the bathroom shaving when he shouted, “fuck”. She heard him and asked what “fuck” means. Her father, bored by her frequent questioning, told her that” fuck” is a synonym for shaving. Almost immediately, she heard a knock on the door and hurried to answer it. She grinned widely when she saw her grandparents on the porch.

"Oh...welcome bitch and bastard." Her grandparents froze. "Grandpa, it’s hot in here, take out your dick." she said and then let out a smirk, hoping to impress them by her vocabulary. “Grandma, do you need help with you pussy?” She continued.

Her grandparents were very shocked. Her grandfather was tongue-tied but her grandmother managed to let a few words slip out of her mouth.
“Where are your parents, dear?” Her grandmother inquired.

Without any hesitation, she answered. "My mom is shitting, in kitchen and my dad is fucking in the bathroom,” Her grandmother started to feel dizzy and suddenly fainted. Fortunately, her husband held her before she fell to the ground. The little girl looked quite shocked, and asked. "What is wrong with the bitch?"

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