This is one of my first stories please critique it and give me any advice thank you. I am planning more in this series of stories.
A friend of mine gave me some free tickets to a high society charity cocktail party. He worked for the company running the event. I would never have been able to attend by myself. I was your typical just graduated college, working for scratch loser. I just barely managed to scrap enough money to get some decent looking clothes.
While getting a drink at the bar I noticed a lovely raven haired beauty also picking up a refresher drink. I placed her age in the early thirties range. She had the most stunning blue eyes, full red mouth, large breasts and a plump squeezable ass.
“I can see we will need plenty of strong drink if we are going to survive this little soiree”. I managed to spit out. She let out a musical laugh. It was obvious she had been dipping in heavily already. “Hi, I’m Jake.”
“Tammy.” She said grinning.
“So, what’s a nice girl doing in a place like this?”
“My firm bought several tickets.”
“Your firm?”
“Yes, I’m a junior partner at a law firm here in town.” I could tell I was out of my depth with a classy hot-shot lawyer like her. “What do you do?”
“I’m a professional scoundrel.” I said flashing my most charming grin.
“Ohhhh a scoundrel is it?” She said while stepping closer to me. “What is it that scoundrels do?”
“Oh nothing extremely interesting. Wooing women, dancing, drinking and general debauchery.”
“Really? And just how does one go about getting into that line of work?” She said shyly.
“Practice, lots and lots of practice.”
“And does practice make perfect?”
“Only one way to find out.”
Five minutes later we were in the backseat of her SUV. We were making out like high schoolers. We had each other out of our clothes in no time. Her pussy was trimmed into a landing strip. I laid her on her back and dived in between her legs. I began lapping away at her pussy like a man starving to death. Now I’ve eaten many a pussy in my day, but the sweet taste of this honeypot was beyond reproach. I used every trick at my disposal to make that cunt sing. Within ten minutes she was arching her back and moaning through her first orgasm. A couple of minutes later she was shuddering through another one. All the while I was drinking down her sweet nectar.
“Wow” she said “I guess practice really does pay off. Now let’s see what you can do with that piece of meat hanging between your legs.”
With that she grabbed my cock and guided it into her dripping cunt. Now I’m only seven and a half inches long, but I’m as thick as a woman’s’ wrist. Her eyes went wide and she gasped as I plunged my full length into that hot, wet hole. I held inside of her for a minute as I let her adjust to the size. When she seemed comfortable with it in her I pulled it all the way out and then drove it in again. I kept this pattern up for several minutes gradually picking up speed, until finally I was pounding her with all my energy. I took her hands and held them above her head to give me greater control.
“Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck” She repeated over and over again like some kind of mantra. “Fuck that pussy, make me your bitch, make me your whore.”
After about fifteen minutes of this I could feel myself getting close. “I’m gonna cum” I called out.
“Fill me up.” She moaned. With that I exploded inside of her. I pumped every ounce of cum I had in her womb. “My god that was fantastic” she panted as I withdrew from her well fucked hole. “I didn’t expect to get laid tonight but I was hoping. Do you like to take over like that all the time?”
“Oh, yes.” I replied “Nothing is quite a turn on like making a woman submissive to me in bed. But, I like to go slow in these chance encounters. You never know how far to go in these situations.”
She started to get dressed “Well, we could take this back to my place.” She said while avoiding my gaze. “I’ve been known to take a somewhat submissive role in the bedroom. In fact, I really miss the touch of a dominant mans hand.”
“Well then slut, give me the keys and get yourself into the passengers seat.” Her eyes lit up with that and within minutes we were on the road. I grabbed her by the hair and pushed her head down into my lap. She dug my rapidly hardening cock out and began to work it over with her mouth like a real pro. I used her GPS to get me back to her place so her mouth didn’t have to leave my cock.
She didn’t live far away and soon we were pulling into her garage. She led me into the house and I stopped her in the living room. Now strip naked for me slave. “Yes, sir” came her immediate response. I grabbed her jaw and forced her to look me in the face. “Yes master” I said sternly. “You will refer to me as master is that understood cunt”.
She cast her eyes to the ground and responded quickly with. “Yes, master. This worthless cunt understands master.” She was very well trained. I could tell I was going to have fun with her. I released her and she proceeded to remove every stitch of clothing until she was standing completely nude before me. Her large firm breasts quivering slightly with every breath she took, her partially shaved pussy gleaming wetly and her head tilted submissively to the floor. A perfect vision of a woman.
“Now on your knees and service me.” She sank to her knees, removed my manhood from my pants and slowly enveloped me with her mouth. She took my whole 7 ½ inches into her throat. Then withdrew and began running her tongue up and down the length, occasionally taking my balls into her mouth. After several minutes of this treatment mixed with several very enjoyable deepthroat sessions I was about ready to explode. But I wasn’t quite ready for that yet.
“Now lead me to your bedroom.” I commanded. “But I want you to go on your hands and knees.” I amended with a smirk.
“Yes, master” came her meek reply. I admired her lovely tight ass swaying in front of me as we made our way to her bedroom, where I would soon be defiling her.
“Get on the bed with your ass in the air. Keep your face down and your eyes locked on your bed.” I ordered. While she was getting in position I rifled through her drawers until I found what I needed. I stretched her hands in front of her and tied them to the headboard with her stockings. Then I stuffed some panties in her mouth as a gag and tied them with still more stockings. I placed a pillow under her hips to keep them up.
“Well don’t you look like the perfect slot. With your ass in the air inviting a hard and thorough fucking.” I placed my finger on her clit and I could feel her whole body vibrate. Then I ran it the length of her snatch, to her asshole where I briefly massaged her puckered opening. “And dripping wet.” I whispered in her ear. “Just another slut begging to have her holes filled with a hard cock.”
“You pretend that you’re a powerful, in control woman.” I said as I finished undressing. “But like all women your only real worth is as a receptacle for a mans cum. My cum”
The entire time I’m talking to her I can see her writhing on the bed trying to grind her pussy into the pillow beneath her. I climb behind her and place the head of my cock against her hot slit. “And now you are about to fulfill your purpose on this earth, your about to receive my cock.”
With that I drive my entire length into her pussy. She lets out a long guttural moan as I violate her ruthlessly. I pause briefly as I savor her degradation. Then I begin to slowly pull out until just the head rests in her, before slamming back in. I keep this up for ten or fifteen minutes. My bound hole reaches two quaking orgasms in this time. But I have more in store for her. She groans in despair as I pull out of her soppy cunt.
“You sound so disappointed slot. But don’t worry I just have one more hole I have to desecrate.” That seemed to penetrate her lust driven fog. She stiffens up and begins shaking her head back and forth while mumbling into her gag. I know this is just an act. A slut like this loves to have her ass raped.
I press my dick up against her tight star shaped hole. She tries to scoot away from my iron hard invader. I grab her hips and pull her back onto my cock. She howls as I force my way into her. I keep her under tight control as I steadily push my way into her bowels. About halfway in I can feel another orgasm sweep through her body.
“See I knew you loved this.” I laughed. “All you cunts love a hard cock up your ass.”
Once I had her filled and stretched I began to fuck that asshole like a jackhammer. With each thrust she lets out an animalistic grunt. I can feel my orgasm approaching. I briefly consider painting her face with my spunk but I decide to fill her ass instead. I release my seed deep inside her.
I collapse on the bed to gather my strength. Reaching over I untie her hands. She slowly stirs and removes her gag. Snuggling up beside me she meekly strokes my cock.
“Is master pleased with his slave?” She asks
“Master is very pleased.” I smirk; wheels turning in my head. “Master can think of all kinds of uses for a whore like you. Oh yes.”
I'm giving you a possitive vote because is a good story idea!
Bu once this said!, you need to re-write and get a lot more deeper into the details, making the Domination and fuckings, longer and much more explicit!
You should slow quite a bit the pase of the story, because at it is, looks like you were in a hurry to finish it!, almost seems like you were jerking off while writing it and wanted to finish the tale before or at the same time than you came!
But as I said, is a good story idea...!
KEEP WRITING!, sure you'll improve your style doing it...!
McDaddy4U77Report
When you finished chapter 4 U SAID TO BE CONTINUED
Anonymous readerReport
76/100
-The Critic
Vanessa TillotsonReport
.
anonymous readerReport
anonymous readerReport
Bu once this said!, you need to re-write and get a lot more deeper into the details, making the Domination and fuckings, longer and much more explicit!
You should slow quite a bit the pase of the story, because at it is, looks like you were in a hurry to finish it!, almost seems like you were jerking off while writing it and wanted to finish the tale before or at the same time than you came!
But as I said, is a good story idea...!
KEEP WRITING!, sure you'll improve your style doing it...!