Brad and Ann have worked together for years. They have gone on business trips together, but never to Austin, When Brad tries to slip away for his usual afternoon dip at Hippie Hollow, Ann is determined she is coming along. Their very professional relationship turns into something else. Join in the fun as they work out their midlife crises in a week of sexual abandon
This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead is purely coincidental
“YOU NEVER CALLED.” Those were the first words out of Evan’s mouth when they were settled in his car. Before that they had put on the standard display of affection, loving couple back together after a week of separation. Even now, the tone of his voice was neutral, more an observation than an accusation.
“It wasn’t stuff I wanted to talk about over the phone.” Here, trapped together in the car, that was perfect. Maybe.
“What kind of stuff?”
“Where to start, where to start. I was a bad girl this week. A really bad girl.”
“How bad?”
“If you can imagine it, I probably did it. Maybe some things beyond that.”
“Really. Okay, let’s play battleship then. But you have to be honest. You can’t lie and say you did things you didn’t.”
“What about the other way?”
“That too. Deep throat?”
“Check.”
“Anal.”
“Check.”
“DP?”
“Check. Are you mad at me?”
“Maybe. What am I missing?”
“With ladies.”
“Oh sure. How did I miss that one? Just oral? Or using a strap-on?”
“Mostly oral with the ladies. A strap-on with Brad.”
“You were fucking Brad with a strap-on? How the hell did that happen?”
“It’s a long story. I’ve got it with me. Want to try it?”
“After it’s been up his ass?”
“Jesus. I washed it off. What about a cock?”
“I’d say wear a rubber. I suppose you could put one on the dildo.”
“What if I did? Would you take it up your butt?”
“What the hell were you doing fucking Brad with a strap-on?”
“It’s a long story.”
“What about the other way around?”
“He wasn’t using a strap-on.”
“Look, I assume he was using his own equipment. Assuming he was doing anything. Which I now have to ask you. You two have been going off on these trips for a long time. Right?”
“Right.”
“And nothing ever happened between you, right?”
“Right. Look, there’s a lake out there. With a nude beach. We went to the beach.”
“So? You see naked guys at the beach all the time.”
“Yeah. you’re right. We went to a restaurant that was a night club and I was dancing with no panties on and I let total stranger fuck me.”
“That’s not like you.”
“Is that all you’re going to say about it? You’re not pissed at me?”
“You could have asked me first.”
“Oh sure. What if I had said I’m going to go out to Austin and throw myself at Brad and go on a slutfest? Not that I would have, because really truly I had no idea that was what I was going to do.”
“I might have tried to talk you out of it.”
“Might have?”
“Look, since you’ve already done those things it’s a little late to second guess, you know? You never called me all week to let me know what was happening.”
“That I’m sorry about. I owed you that much at least. So what now?”
“I guess we need to talk through some stuff. Obviously something is going wrong.”
“You aren’t fucking me enough.” There it was. The turd on the table, as Brad’s manager liked to say. “Why not?”
“You’ve been working a lot of late nights. On the road a lot.”
“You’ve been working a lot too. Going to night school.”
“Because you’re ahead of me. Way ahead of me. I’m never going to catch up with you.”
“Oh. Does that bother you?”
“To have you making twice what I do? Maybe not quite twice, but almost. I don’t even know why you’re hanging on to me. I’m just this loser from high school.”
“What?” Ann was crying. “What? Oh baby, whatever made you think I felt like that? Oh God, I feel so awful now.”
“Really?”
“Really. You know what Brad told me? His wife supported him for a few years. While he was writing and then when he went back to business school. Now he’s the one making money. We could do that. If we got married, you could go to school full time and get a nice job.”
“Then you could be a mommy? Do you want to do that?”
“Yes. No. Maybe. One step at a time.”
“You would do that? Let me do school full time?”
“Of course I’d do that. So what’s the plan for the weekend?”
“We need to leave for Boston by six at the latest.”
“In the morning?”
“Of course in the morning. I’m staying at your house so we can get an early start.”
“Not in the guest room. Not tonight.”
“Your mother will have a conniption.”
“So be it. What about up there?”
“The reception is at a hotel. We have rooms there.”
“That sounds more promising.”
“I’m not sure who is supposed to be sleeping where.”
“We’ll figure it out.”
It was well after midnight by the time they pulled into her driveway. “I’ve to get some wash done.” Ann took her suitcase over the washing machine, started to dump the dirty stuff in, no sorting into loads. She absentmindedly added what she had on. God, it was disgusting, peeling off her body.
“What about this dress?”
“It needs to be dry-cleaned.”
“Bummer. Your bathing suit?”
“Never wore it.” Ann gave a little giggle.
“Not even down to the water?”
“Nope. Take off our clothes and leave them in the car.” She realized her mother might not be too sound asleep, and started to whisper. “Okay, let’s go fuck while this is running. What?”
“I don’t know. You’re usually not that blunt.”
“Oh Evan, darling, wouldn’t it be so romantic to make love to the dulcet sounds of the washing machine? Maybe right on top of it? No, that wouldn’t be too good if my mother wakes up, would it?”
“How much have you had to drink?”
Ann pouted, trying to think. “Five beers over at the lake.”
“Five beers, at the lake? Why so many?”
“Because Brad connived to get us to the lake really early so we could spend the afternoon swimming and fucking. At his convenience. He was just taking for granted that I was going to be his little fuck toy. So I told him I wanted a lot of beer if I was going to do it. Thinking it would shame him out of it. But no, he just went and bought us a twelve pack.”
“He was fucking you?”
“Well didn’t you tell me to get it out of my system? And his wife told him the same thing.”
“And did you?”
“Maybe. Actually after all that we ran into another couple and he fucked them instead. But anyway at least five beers at the lake and then another one at the airport, then we got upgraded to first class, so we were getting free drinks all the way back. Why? You think I might be hung over in the morning?”
“I don’t think you’re going to be sober by morning.”
“What’s the point of even going to sleep?”
“I have to drive.”
“Let my mother drive. She’ll get us up there faster.”
“She will?”
“Sure. Little old lady? In an Olds? Who’s going to pull her over? And if they do, the cops think it’s a mistake.”
“Not like a blonde driving an Eclipse?”
“Exactly. We can just spend the night ...” she caught herself in time, “making love.”
“Sounds like a plan.” Evan was looking through her suitcase. He was betraying no interest in her lack of clothing. Well, they had been naked together many times. “Just trying to see if you missed any dirty laundry? This is the strap-on?” He held up a bag. “What’s this?” He had found the printouts Rachel had given her.
“Remember I told you I let myself get fucked by a total stranger?”
“That’s him? Sam Minton? You’ve got to be kidding.” Evan was staring at the image from the privacy room. “That’s him? That’s you?”
“That’s him. That’s me.”
“Jesus.” He pushed her face down on the washing machine, pulled her legs apart.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m looking at your cheating asshole. I’m looking at my cock up against it, what it looks like as it slides right in.”
“What does it look like?”
“It looks great.” He started to fuck her, very slowly.
“What are you doing?”
“Enjoying the view. What’s the rush? There’s still twenty minutes to go in the wash cycle.”
“What if my mother...”
“Who knows? Maybe she used to do this.”
“Oh my God!” Was she going to turn into her mother? Soft and sweet and round? Never. Never.
“Hi dear.”
“Hi Mom.” There was her mother’s voice, back behind her somewhere.
“I see you and Evan are catching up. Remember the time you caught your father and me doing that?”
“No.”
“You were about three years old, just standing there staring at us. After that we stuck to doing it in the bedroom.”
“Time to load the dryer.” That was Evan. She realized she had dozed off. Twenty minutes. Hadn’t she heard something about twenty minutes on the wash cycle?
“Did my mother?”
“Your mother what?”
“Nothing. I must have been dreaming. You just kept fucking me the whole time? While I was sleeping?”
“Yep.”
“You came in my asshole? While I was sleeping??
“A couple times.”
“Jesus, I need the bathroom.” Which fortunately was right there, because when she stood up there was stuff dribbling down her legs. She barely sat down before everything emptied out in a rush. Shower, she needed a shower. A nice long quiet one. But Evan was in the bathroom, peeing in the pot, flushing it to scald her, then taking his clothes off to come in with her and steal her hot water. He was horny again. Rubbing behind her.
“Didn’t we just do that? Let’s try the other way around.”
“I thought maybe we’d do that when we were in the hotel?”
“You want to go to sleep?”
“Not really.”
“Well then.” She went out to the laundry room and found the strap-on.
“Maybe we should do it in the bed?”
“Might be messy. You’re just lucky it wasn’t a mess in the laundry room.”
“Really. Too much information.”
“Lean over the sink.” He could look into the mirror and see her behind him, ready to poke the thing into his butt. Kissing down his back. Then pushing his legs apart to lick the back of his balls.
“Ooh, that is wild. What are you doing?” No reply. Well, her tongue was busy. He was ready to come just from the touch of it. Then she was back again, pushing into him. Even with the tongue preparing the way he was tight. It hurt, but he wasn’t going to complain.
She was grabbing his wrists. “No cheating. We do this until I see you come. Or it’s time to leave.”
“What about folding the laundry?”
“You know what? You are totally lacking in romance.”
“This is your idea of romantic?”
“You know that pic you saw? Of me and Sam? Think about that. About being me. About what it would be like to have that huge thing inside you, filling you, making you glow.”
She started to sing. “I could have fucked all night, I could have fucked all night, and still have fucked some more. I could have spread my twat, and let him find the spot, he never found before.”
“Where the hell did that come from.”
“Sorority. Long time ago.”
The dryer stopped. “Shit.” She pulled out, found a wash cloth to wipe his butt and the dildo. She walked out to the laundry room still wearing the strap-on.’
“What the hell?”
“We aren’t finished yet. It’s not even five yet.”
“You really are in a strange mood.”
“Good mooorning!”
“Oh my God, it’s your mother!”
“Ann?” That from the direction of her room with a bed untouched. “Oh, naughty, naughty. Ann? Evan?” That with more alarm as the guest bedroom was untouched also. “Sweeties?” That coming closer. Ann was paralyzed, unable to pull on some of the clean clothes. Unable to even ditch the strap-on. “Ann?” Her mother poked her head past the laundry room door, withdrew immediately.
“It’s only five. Mom.”
“We need to leave by six. Did you try on your dress?”
“No. Where is it?”
“On your bed, sweetie.”
“Oh.”
“You need to try it on. Now.”
“Okay.”
Evan had retrieved his clothes. He went out into the hall, returned with the dress. “Maybe you should take off the dildo?”
“Oh. Yeah.”
“You okay?” That was a dumb question.
Ann gave a weak nod, then rushed off into the bathroom to vomit. “Better now.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Oh who knows. Too much sun, too much booze, too much sex. The Southwest chicken salad ...” she gagged, and rushed off to vomit some more.
“Does is fit okay honey? Do I need to take it in?” Her mother came back to find her daughter still naked, in obvious distress.
“Upgrade. First class. Free drinks.” Ann managed to croak that much out.
“She was like this when I picked her up,” Evan said.
“Sick?”
“No, just really, really wasted.”
“And you spent the whole night taking advantage of her?”
“Mom, we’re engaged.”
“Do you think you can get the dress on, without messing it up?”
“Maybe. Jesus. Fucking. Christ.” That was enough to make her mother wince. She was sprinting back to the bathroom. “Okay, there’s nothing left.”
“Wipe your mouth off.”
“Okay, okay.” She rinsed all of herself off, brushed her teeth, gargled. She almost felt human again. The bridesmaid dress was turquoise, soft sort of silky chiffon fabric, semi transparent, not much more than a sundress. “What is this?” She tried it on. Slit on either side almost to the waist, top not much more than a couple of straps barely covering her breasts.
“The theme of the wedding is Afternoon of a Faun,” her mother said. “You’re supposed to be Greek nymphs.”
“I was doing Afternoon of a Faun all week,” Ann giggled. “Really, what am I supposed to wear under this? It’s going to show if I wear a bra. Same for panties.”
“Leotard?” her mother suggested. “Maybe we can pick one up on the way there.”
“Isn’t this an outdoor wedding? What’s the weather forecast.”
“Mid nineties.”
“No way I’m wearing a leotard. It’ll just turn transparent anyway if I start sweating.”
“Are you packed?” That was her mother nagging again.
“Suitcase out in my car,” Evan said.
“What about you, sweetie?”
“How the fuck can I be packed? The stuff is still in the fucking dryer. Sorry. Look what is it, just one night? I’ve still got the cosmetics packed, okay bathing suit, some undies, sundress. If we go out later, I’ll wear up the jeans skirt and a top.”
“Nightgown? Robe? Pool shoes? Okay, what do you want for breakfast?”
“Maybe I’ll skip breakfast.”
“Evan?”
“What are you making?”
“Maybe some of those frozen waffles?’
“Mom, if you heat those up I’m going to be sick again. Isn’t there a brunch before the ceremony?”
“At eleven. A long time from now. Maybe you could sit out on the front porch?”
“Fine.” There was barely a hint of light. Almost midsummer, but it was so early the stars were still out. She started to sing. “They’re like the stars on a summer’s morning. First they appear, and then they’re gone.” Never had she felt so close to the song. She’d taken her heart out of its golden casket, she’d thrown caution to the winds, she’d lived as if there was no tomorrow. And now tomorrow was here, and she felt really, really shitty. Marry Evan, support him through the rest of law school, live off his salary while they had children? Had she really promised she would do that? Well, something like that had worked out for Brad and his wife. Who knew? Maybe someday Evan would be a famous politician, mayor, senator, governor, even president. Hadn’t Brad been struggling at the same age, and look at him now.
“What are you thinking?” Evan had come out to offer her a cup of coffee.
“I’m thinking how you might blossom the way Brad has. If I cared for you the way his wife has.”
“Is that what you want to do?”
“Ask me when I’m sober. If that ever happens. What are we doing?”
“You are going to go back inside and use the bathroom. Then you are going to get in the back seat of your mother’s car. With a barf bag. And try to doze off. I’m going to sit up front with her and talk to her to keep her awake.”
“We’re leaving now?”
“Now. Look, all you need to do is get yourself in the car.”
She tried to pee, but there was nothing left to come out. She had purged everything. No coffee then. Better to leave well enough alone. Into the back seat of the Olds then. Usually Evan sat with her and the two of them would be naughty while her mother was hopefully keeping her eyes on the road. Not this morning. There was enough room for her to lie down. She had dozed off before the car started.
“What happened to her?” Ann’s mother was hissing over the muffled roar of the engine as the car got into motion.
“She was like this when I picked her up. In a mood and wasted to boot. Something about five beers at the lake, the one at the airport, and then they got upgraded to first class so they had free drinks all the way home.”
“Oh dear. I hope this is not the start of something. Her father had a drinking problem. Seems to go with being a squarehead.”
“Really? I thought it went with being Irish.”
“Why so many beers at the lake?”
“You don’t really want to know. I made the mistake of asking her that question. I told her before this trip that she should get it out of her system.”
“Her crush on Brad? I told her the same thing.”
“Well apparently they were doing that. Maybe over doing it. Then she said something really odd. I didn’t catch it at the time, but now it is really strange. Maybe it’s the Greek theme of the wedding. She said after all that they ran into another couple. And Brad ...ah … had sex with them instead.”
“Oh. He’s gay?”
“I don’t know.”
“Evan dear, I need to ask you a very personal question. That thing Ann was wearing? What was she doing with it?”
“She was, ah, sodomizing me.”
“Oh. I had heard that was the fashion now. Evan, I have to ask you. Have you ever done that with other people? With … other men?”
“You know that Ann has had girlfriends.”
“I guess I know that. I know she was very troubled by some of the things that happened in college, things that she hated, things she liked that she shouldn’t have. You didn’t answer my question.”
“A very long time ago.”
“In college?”
“Before that.”
“High school?”
“Before that.”
“Oh. Oh my. You weren’t one of those poor boys they talk about on the news?”
“I was an altar boy. It was part of my training.”
“What.”
“They made it seem very routine. It was part of the curriculum. There were training sessions with the boys and the priests together and the priests would demonstrate on the older boys and initiate the younger ones. Into a sacred mystery. It was so much pleasure. So addictive.”
“And?”
“I got too old. Then I started to play sports and all the kids were making jokes about fags. So I just shut up about it, tried to pretend it had never happened.”
“Evan, there were some pictures in that suitcase. Do you know anything about them?”
“Not very much.”
“Why would she have them in her suitcase? The one of the girl dancing looked like her.”
“Yes.”
“And the other one?”
“Mrs. Lindsen, you really need to have that discussion with her. If you want to. I don’t think you were supposed to see those pictures.”
“What am I supposed to say? Ann darling is that really a picture of you – how did you put it – being sodomized by a black man?”
“Sam Minton.”
“The singer? He was on Lawrence Welk a few times, years ago. I hope he’s better at that than he was at singing.”
“He’s very big.”
“Yes I could see that.”
“I mean in the country western music world.”
“Oh.”
There were choking sounds from the back seat. “Honey, are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” More chokes, then giggles. “I’ve been awake. For awhile.”
“Oh. Oh dear. You’ve been listening to us?”
“Listening to how much you love me. How much I’ve let you down.”
“Dearest, we both told you that you needed to work it out with Brad.”
“And his wife told him the exact same thing. But I went, way, way beyond that. So did he, maybe because I dragged him into it. Look, I promise you when I feel better, when we get this stupid wedding behind us, I’ll tell you everything. Every sordid detail, if that’s what you want. And if it isn’t, I won’t force it on you.”
“And your next trip?”
“One thing at a time. Okay? There might not even be a next trip.” With that, Ann closed her eyes again. Evan and her mother didn’t talk much the rest of the way.