| 2015-01-29 00:07:28 |
The Storm_(3)
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Thanks, great story, potty mouth ;-) |
| 2015-02-13 13:03:28 |
A Different Type of Fun at the Fair Part 02
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Try editing your stories. If you aren't sure how to do it, here is a hint: read it aloud and think if it makes sense. Your writing is disjointed and shows confused thoughts. She's a blonde, the carpet and drapes match, yet she has brown pubic hair. One sentence says twenty minutes and the next fifteen minutes. There a many other instances of missing or wrong words. Please be more careful before posting. |
| 2015-02-23 22:26:40 |
Meeting Ashley (Prologue and Chapter One)
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Positive, with a bit of editing it could even be better. I will PM you to help. |
| 2015-02-24 00:24:16 |
"BUILDING# 1369"
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Kinky and too cool. Thanks. |