| 2010-08-30 07:59:32 |
I meet my new neighbour and WOW
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To much "he said" "she said", needs dialoge |
| 2010-09-13 16:48:06 |
Friendship Bribe
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Nice idea, but needs work and more feeling. |
| 2010-09-13 17:24:26 |
My stepsisters
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Rude kid, not sexy, bad for the mood. 9 inch cock and knowing the girl has 34DD boobs? Just say huge, and leave the actual measurement to the imagination. Some grammar and editing issues. Plot and action is good though. |
| 2010-09-29 17:00:13 |
Night of Eternal Pleasure Pt 2 : Gone camping.
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I liked it, but just wish it was longer. But I like stories, not just fucking. |
| 2010-09-29 17:50:59 |
My life being turned around by my almost sister (A teenage boy’s fantasy coming true II)
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Would like to see it rewritten as a long story. I like they don't just fuck at the start, but are working up to it. |